From Boys into Men: Initiating ourselves and supporting each other to become, more fully – Partners, Husbands, Fathers, Sons and Effective Stewards, of both our inner & outer worlds of responsibility.
The aim of this Men’s Group is to create a context where each man is able to be honest, vulnerable and feels safe enough to speak his previously undisclosed inner truth in the presence of other supportive men, and to feel and show emotions other than anger. In the words of Ken Wilber:
In a safe environment, surrounded by empathy, congruence, and acceptance, the individual can begin to tell the truth about his or her interior without fear of retribution. And thus the false self – at whatever level – tends to lose the reason for its existence. The lie – the resistance to truthfulness – is interpreted, and the concealed pain and terror and anguish disclose themselves, and the false self slowly burns in the fire of truthful awareness. The truthful interiors are shared in an inter-subjective circle of care and compassion, which releases them from their imprisonment in deception and allows them to join the ongoing growth of consciousness – the beauty of the actual self shines through, and the intrinsic joy of the new depth is its own reward.From ’A Brief History of Everything’ Page 172
A place where men can feel their deepest emotions – laugh and cry and restore a true brotherhood by learning how to love and trust each other without fear of ridicule.
It is also a place where men learn the value of giving and keeping their word. Many men have difficulty keeping their word to themselves (both in small matters and large) let alone to wives, husbands, partners, family colleagues and friends. We often give our word carelessly or out of fear of disappointing someone or with good intentions, only to find we don’t honour our promises. Keeping our word is one of the most fundamental requirements for maintaining healthy relationship. Here we can explore the meaning of living from a place of integrity.
Call Dermot Grove-White for a free introductory appointment
416-535-1200 or email email@example.com
About the facilitator
Dermot Grove-White himself joined a similar men’s group over 30 years ago at a time when his life had started to slowly implode. He’d been in denial about his pain as a child and his needs as an adult, and tried to be a husband, father and breadwinner – attempting to do so as a boy in a man’s body. Growing up he’d come to believe that being honest about who he was and what his needs were not welcome and he took that script into his first marriage and professional life.
Eventually the artifice crumbled and his life lay in ruins.
He tried first to work with female therapists but eventually he did what he’d most resisted – he opened up to men. He was terrified upon entering his first men’s group. Eight years at all male boarding schools as boy and a number of sexual abuse incidents as child had taught him to be guarded around all men. As he watched and listened, he was amazed at the honesty, sincerity and compassion in the room of some twenty or so men. By the end he was sharing what he was actually feeling and eager to return.
After receiving further training at the Institute of Self Healing and many other courses and workshops he has now been running Men’s Groups for over twenty-five years – sometimes up to three a week. He also has co-led monthly weekend retreats for t 13 years.
About The Group
Unlike some 12 step groups where cross talk is discouraged this group uses the interactions amongst the members to uplift their experiences through a co-commitment to take responsibility for there own feelings and not blame others
Prerequisites: A willingness to explore the fullness of one’s feelings in a healthy way and to take full responsibility for them – eschewing blame and victimhood.
Groups are usually 6- 12 members in size